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The perfection problem: How friendships help first鈥憏ear students manage depression

- August 28, 2014

Students arriving on campus. (File photo)
Students arriving on campus. (File photo)

You can feel a change coming in the air 鈥 and it鈥檚 more than the slight dip in temperature. It鈥檚 the U-Haul trucks; the lineups in the coffee lines; the energy on the streets in university towns like Halifax and Truro.

They鈥檙e coming.

Thousands of new students will arrive on university campuses across Canada this weekend, ready to take their first steps into higher learning. It鈥檚 an exciting time, but certainly not one without its stresses.

One group of students who can face challenges in their first year on campus is those with perfectionistic tendencies. With expectations a bit higher in university, and with many running up against early assignments that test their abilities like never before, students who are overly focused on grades or achievement can sometimes encounter new struggles.

鈥淚 think it鈥檚 fair to say perfectionism is rife in academia,鈥 explains , a clinical psychologist and faculty member at Dal who researches perfectionism. 鈥淧eople with perfectionistic traits select themselves into high-achieving, pressure-filled environments like academia, and then those environments strengthen their dispositional tendencies to be perfectionistic. There鈥檚 an interplay.鈥

Perfectionism isn鈥檛 inherently a bad thing; quite the opposite, in many cases. We all have some perfectionistic tendencies and, if utilized well, they can be a driver for personal success. But not all types of perfectionism are equal. One dimension in particular 鈥 socially prescribed perfectionism 鈥 can be quite destructive, and is often associated with depression, anxiety and other psychological disorders. It鈥檚 when an individual bases their desire to be perfect on their perceived expectations of others 鈥 and in an environment of papers, grades and exams, that can be a big problem for some students.

鈥淭he perfectionistic traits that drive you to come to university may also be the perfectionistic traits that make you depressed at university,鈥 says Dr. Sherry. 鈥淚t鈥檚 a double-edged trait: it drives you to succeed and it can drive you to distress.鈥

Relationships matter


Recent research from Dal lecturer Sean Mackinnon, completed during his PhD studies at Dal with Dr. Sherry, offers insight into how that perfectionism can affect first-year students 鈥 and how successful students manage it.

Dr. Mackinnon鈥檚 study looked at nearly 130 students starting at university for the first time, having them answer questionnaires and take part in detailed narrative interviews over the course of their fall term. The study was conducted with Dal students, but Dr. MacKinnon says the results would be expected at any major university in Canada. (The paper, published in The Canadian Journal of Behavioural Science, is co-authored by researchers at Western University and Wilfrid Laurier University.)

The study鈥檚 takeaway: interpersonal relationships matter a great deal.

鈥淧eople who are high-end on the socially prescribed perfectionism scale tended to do worse when they had problems in their close interpersonal relationships, specifically those from before university; in particular, breaking off from those high school or earlier friends in a way that was unsatisfactory,鈥 explains Dr. Mackinnon. 聽

鈥淪ometimes that鈥檚 just drifting away and not being in touch as often anymore, and sometimes it鈥檚 a big fight or argument, but that transition to university often means geographical separation for those old friendships. When that was more unpleasant for whatever reason, rates of depression or depressive affect increased.鈥

Dr. Mackinnon describes a prototypical story that popped up time and time again in his interviews, which he called the 鈥減rom story.鈥 It involves a student having one last big gathering with their high school friends 鈥 sometimes at prom, sometimes at a party or other event. How students perceived that event was often telling about their ability to manage depression.

鈥淸The event] solidifies for people whether these are friends you鈥檙e going to keep for life, or if this might be the last time you鈥檇 ever see them,鈥 he explains. 鈥淭hat prototypical event could be interpreted in different ways. Most people saw it in a positive way, but the people who had trouble with the separation were often ones who had a more difficult time in their first year.鈥

In essence, close friendships are a support system for perfectionists. They rely on them to help them through stresses and challenging times. But university is a major transition point for many friendships, and a student鈥檚 first few months on campus 鈥 away from old friends but only starting to make new ones 鈥 can threaten that support system.

鈥淧erfectionists are prone to living their life in a very narrow space, where great emphasis is placed on achievement often to the exclusion of relationships,鈥 says Dr. Sherry. 鈥淭he irony, then, is that relationships are often one of the best ways to address and deal with that.鈥

The importance of getting involved


So how can first-year students who struggle with the transition into university manage their perfectionism and its negative effects?

鈥淔or a subset of perfectionists, it will be important to seek help, and for perfectionists that鈥檚 often difficult because it involves admitting imperfections and limitations,鈥 says Dr. Sherry. 鈥淏ut we have strong resources on campus with Counselling and Psychological Services that students can access if they find themselves distressed.鈥

But for others struggling a bit in their first year, the researchers say it鈥檚 important to get involved on campus: make time for clubs, social events, study groups; for forming new relationships and building a network of friends to spend time with.

鈥淧erfectionists are prone to putting all their eggs in one basket, to developing an overly narrow focus on achievement,鈥 says Dr. Sherry. 鈥淭o counter that, it鈥檚 important to have a diverse and stable set of activities beyond just work or school.鈥

鈥淲e know that close, intimate friendships, especially at this age, is a protective factor against a lot of psychological problems; it鈥檚 not destiny for someone with perfectionism to have a psychological disorder,鈥 adds Dr. Mackinnon. 鈥淎nd university is one of those rare times in your life when you have an entire community you鈥檙e living and studying among, often with similar interests.鈥

The researchers note that actively seeking out new friendships doesn鈥檛 come naturally to everyone. But for students looking to succeed at university, and make the most of the experience, it鈥檚 key.

鈥淯niversity is a time when you can make a lot of new friends that can be incredibly important in your life, in many ways,鈥 says Dr. Mackinnon. 鈥淎nd that鈥檚 as true for perfectionists as it is for everyone.鈥